
The reason why we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes, with everyone else’s highlight reel. Comparison is an act of violence against thy beautiful self.
A few months ago, I had to take some time off from my social media accounts, and even my own blog as I started toΒ βunconsciouslyβ compare myself‘ to many other bloggers.
I began to really criticise myself badly and put myself down, as I just felt I wasnβt good enough, that I was ugly, old and just simply, not interesting enough.
I got sucked into the mad dark hole of comparison on social media β constantly saying things to myself like:Β Β why canβt I do flat lays like them? Why canβt my camera take pictures like that? Why canβt I look like her? Why canβt myΒ TwitterΒ /Β FacebookΒ /Β InstagramΒ grow like theirs? Why arenβt I getting the huge traffic to my blog?Β How can I improve to make people think Iβm interesting enough to follow?
These questions and many others were repeated over & over in my head, and within time I started to feel like I was worthless, not good enough, not interesting and ugly, and soonΒ my anxiety reached to such a levelΒ that I started to struggle with leaving my own home.




While social media is incredibly amazing to connect with people world wide within seconds and be one of the best tools for a blogger but when things arenβt going well, or youβre not getting enough likes on a post, or your losing followers or the traffic to your blog is low, it can destroy and crash your soul.
But you donβt need to be a blogger to get affected β it happens to everyday people too. Back in the day, you would compare yourself to models, entertainers by looking through a magazine β¦now, itβs basically pressing on an app from your own phone.
Once I took that time off social media, I took away the pressure of comparison to all the drop dead gorgeous and fabulous bloggers and decided once & for all to just be me. It was like a weight had lifted off of my shoulders and the heaviness of the pressure (on myself) went away. I embraced⦠ME.
I was able to work on my spirit and soul, enjoy time just watching my trashy television shows, read magazines and books β basically, enjoy life again. The simple life. I had to get my mind in check and find that warrior strength within me again.
No matter how strong you normally are, comparing yourself to others is the one battle you are never going to win β itβs a losing battle. I just wanted to share some of my tips that have helped me over the past few months and hope that they can help you too.
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
I am so guilty of this and I used to do it all of the time, but over the past couple of months I donβt do it as much.
But still itβs so easy to compare yourself to someone else when youβre scrolling through feeds of people who are doing so well, and here you are slogging away and questioning yourself what it is that you are doing wrong.
By comparing ourselves to others we are disregarding the beauty of ourselves. Donβt imitate someone elseβs vision for your own as that is creating a sense of false entrapment, and also itβs no good for your own self-esteem, self-growth and self-love β and really, you lose a sense of who you are.
Minimize Your Time on Social Media
In this day and age, we all live on our phones. Regardless of how old you are, we are now a society of people who are focused on looking down at our phones, tablets, iPads and/or laptops. We are missing out on the beauty and wonder of life, going past us.
From the moment I would wake up in the morning, the first thing I would do is go straight onto my phone and check Facebook and Instagram. Then I would sneak in every moment possible at work, during my lunch break and again, when I would get home.Β My husbandΒ used to get so annoyed & frustrated whenever we would go out somewhere the moment we sat down, within seconds I would be there ticking likes, commenting on peoples posts and uploading my own posts too.
I slowly started to notice I was missing out on things that were happening around me, in the physical sense: family time, not concentrating on my work at my office job (it started to suffer) and my concentration ability wavered, and was noticed by work colleagues and my husband,Β but also, my anxiety returned full throttle.
I now limit my time on social media, and only allow myself 10 minutes four times a day (during my mid-morning break, at lunch time, afternoon break and again at night): a total of 40 minutes per day. I donβt always stick with that exact time limit but I do make sure I donβt go over an hour a day.Β It really does your head in, spending so much time glued down looking at your phone.
Outfit I'm Wearing Today
Polo white shirt β $9.99 bought atΒ H&MΒ | Sunglasses β $29.99 bought atΒ ZaraΒ | Green high waisted straight leg pants β $50.00 bought atΒ PrettyLittleThingΒ | Red high heels β $40.00 boughtΒ ZaraΒ in Portugal.






Always Remember You & Celebrate the Amazing You
Social media is an amazing place where we can connect with so many people from all different walks of life, around the world in a second. We get to upload our photos instantly, document our achievements, our special moments and happiness, but the thing is we never truly see what the story is behind the scene of that shot.
We only see the good and the pretty, but never the bad, the ugly, or the plain kooky or weird. A majority of us still have a fear of truly being ourselves and revealing who we are in case someone out there may belittle, laugh or bully usΒ for being different.
I now refuse to mimic the way that someone else does a post β itβs just not reflective of who I am as a person, and what my personality, my tastes & likes are. I used to try to mimic a lot of the top bloggers Instagram posts, the way they posed and dressed, the way they did their flat lays etc etc …and in the end it got me so down, that I felt fake, and basically like another copy-cat in the super large ocean of Instagram. I knew that I couldn’t be like someone else, as I wasn’t happy anymore… I wanted to be me. So I changed my own game and decided to celebrate my personality, my eccentricities and my tastes, and reveal my stories.
I recently had a comment on a recent Instagram post where a follower said:Β βyour posts always stand out in my feed because they arenβt generic like everyone elseβsβ.
Case in point: celebrate the wonderful you, always and be proud.
Change Your Thoughts
When youβre feeling so down, and negative thoughts are running through your head & you feel so unsure about things, itβs time to pull yourself aside and have a little chat: a little one on one time with yourself.
By changing the way we think can make a huge difference in helping us feel better about ourselves, and getting that confidence back. It wonβt happen over-night but if you plant the seed of turning a negative thought around, you will soon see positive changes in your thinking and how your feeling.Β The energy in your spirit will radiate!
Start by writing down either in a journal what you are grateful for each and every day; what you like about yourself and what you are proud about yourself.
Write down on post-it notes positive affirmations, and stick them around on the bathroom mirror, the refrigerator, the bedroom wall, on your bed-side table and/or on the side of your computer screens. And repeat the sayings. It really does work and you will soon see a difference.



Remember we can never be like anybody else as we can only be the who we are. We are all unique, different and beautiful in our own ways. How boring the world would be if we all became like each other.
Be authentic and use that to grow and move ahead in life. Less time wishing to look like Kylie Jenner or any other top blogger, and more time on embracing the amazing and awesome you!
At the endΒ of the day, people will respect, appreciate and respond more to you for being youβre own authentic self, staying true to who you are. So embrace it and use it to your advantage.
SHOP SIMILAR TO WHAT I'M WEARING
What are some ways you stop yourself from taking part in the comparison game? I’d love to know in the comments below xoxo